Just like the stars of television, movies, or literature, video game
characters can be memorable for a number of different reasons. Some are
noble; some are sympathetic; some are hilarious...but some are just
plain annoying. Here follows some of the worst offenders.
Toad (Super Mario Bros.)
"Your princess is in another castle." This munchkin reject will say
that to Mario up to seven times during the game, if played through
straight without warp zones. The first time is amusing. The second time
is exasperating, but at least feels like a good prank. Every other time
is just annoying. If Toad knows where the princess is, he should just
tell Mario, rather than continually speak up after the fact. It's like
he's messing with Mario for no other reason than because he isn't tough
enough to save the princess himself.
Quina (Final Fantasy IX)
The Final Fantasy series often has joke characters, ranging from
cowardly Edward in Final Fantasy IV to the multiple appearances of the
ill-fated Wedge and Biggs in various installments of the series. But
the most infuriating of them all is Quina, from Final Fantasy IX. This
blue creature (of a thankfully undefined gender) turns every single
situation into a discussion of eating. The food humor gets old quickly,
and so does the mini-game he...she...it features. The only redeeming
factor for Quina is that it's so useless in battle that no player
should ever actually have it in their party, so nobody's forced to
endure it that much.
Dan (Street Fighter Alpha 2)
Dan is simply pathetic. He is a weaker version of Street Fighter
stalwart Ryu in every way. For the gamer unaware that he's only in
there as a joke, playing Dan is the ultimate frustration. Even if you do
know he's a joke, his inclusion means that there is simply one less
meaningfully playable combatant in the game; the time spent programming
and drawing his art could have been used to make a new, useful
character.
Carmen Sandiego (Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?)
This game that tests world trivia is both a great teaching tool and
an enjoyable game. But it's nearly impossible to ever actually finish.
Completing the game requires actually finding Carmen Sandiego...and
this is a nearly impossible task. Carmen Sandiego only very rarely is
the actual villain of any game, and only a completely perfect run can
possibly capture her. In fact, a diligent player playing 100 times in a
row may never actually see this slippery villainess.
Raiden (Metal Gear Solid 2)
As any fan knows, Metal Gear Solid is a stealth game that details
the adventure of hero Solid Snake. So the obvious question facing
players of Metal Gear Solid 2 is: Who the heck is this Raiden guy? And
the next most obvious question is: Why the heck is he naked? This
effeminate no-name is the game's lead for no apparent reason. The plot
twist was unpopular, and Raiden simply frustrated aficionados of the
series.
The Dog (Duck Hunt)
There's nothing worse than a sidekick who mocks the player. And the
unnamed dog in Duck Hunt is the worst offender in the history of video
games. Miss all the ducks, and he pops up with an enormously snide grin
to laugh in your face. No other game character even comes close to be
as annoying as this pesky beast.